Don’t ignore me....

I’m tired of being ignored

What if I wrote my emotions down in away that didn’t rhyme 
I feel like I’m living in the idiom to pay for the crime you have to do the time 
I don’t feel the usual ok I don’t feel fine 
It’s not an empty feeling anymore it’s these thoughts swirling inside my head as I lie here in bed with my LED light setting on red 
My stomach feels weird no not cramps but it’s like a sharp pain
That courses through it when my heart clenches i wish (not in a bad way) someone else felt the same 
Not that it would make a difference relating to them what is that going to bring 
you can talk to so many and it still won’t change a thing

Today I was completely invisible and I felt like I was there but watching as my body moved on it’s own as I sat in the corner of my mind. 

The cause of one feeling another persons hate I detach from mind in other words dissociate 
Scenes play out in front of me but it’s only now that it’s coming down on me like a ton of bricks 
I searched and the internet did say it could be extremely painful when your being ignored but when you don’t no the reason why
it really makes you want to cry
Cry harder than before 
I just can’t take it anymore. 

Today you reached right past me with a content sigh like I wasn’t there but my stupid heart when it comes to you I still care.

 I hope he not you 
has as much trouble sleeping as I do.
If I do sleep it’s always light  it’s never really deep 
Sleep 
Wake up 
Spend most of the day  alone engulfed in social media 
Eat in the kitchen
Avoid you as much as possible 
Sleep 
Wake up 
Lost your appetite 
Your phones your best friend by your side until the end 
Avoid you again
Maybe today I’ll go to the park or for a walk I wish there was someone I could talk ... to 
Sleep wake up 
I’ve lost my smile they haven’t realised it’s been gone for a while 
Sleep wake up
still alive 
But should I be thankful 
Cause each day I feel your stabbing me with more and more swords 
When is the breaking point where i stop caring if I’m ignored.