End of childish thoughts.

Now I'm old and have have to banish childish thoughts. 

That hand of wishes has become small sharp stones.
 
Now I'm old there's not going to be a wedding dress, old lady me can't wear lace and white clothes. 
Now I am an old barren hag with a handbag. 

End the thoughts of more children. 
Your not twenty one that time it was how it was.
You did what you did.
Should have made better choices in that childish youth of mine. 

That fist full of stones how they are grinding like your teeth. 
Childish or not.
Nothing is wrong with fear. 

I throw the stones bigger than my fist into the wheelbarrow and cart them away. 

Under that hedge to lay childish thoughts dumped with them. 
I'm old I've had my turn too bad if I fucked it up. 

I'm degradable and have a blown gear box, a bit long in the tooth.
A pause.
And considering I ain't no spring chicken should have tossed such childish thoughts of being a wife and having a baby with a man who is worthy. 
Many many years ago. 

Stop being so silly, can't be her anymore because she is dead. 
Just old lady now, one cat two grown kids and a man. 

History won't repeat, way too many crows feet. 

Childish thoughts, what good where you to me anyway. 

The wishes I had are now coal. 
Fossilized my childhood. 

Abandoned my heart for non special occasions, sorry but registrar office wedding did not count to me. 
But what was, was. 
No corrections for what's already past. 

Stopped the childish notion of one day having what I should have done wright in the first place. 

It's too late. 

 Your in old age.