Escape

His escape from life is drugs and alcohol… but mine is him.
I don't know. I guess it's like this: I need him, I want him, I don't know what to do without him, I want him to love me, I want him to hold me, I want him to kiss me, I want to marry him like he promised... I'm not sure how much of what he told me is true but god how much I want it to be. 
I guess what I want is to be his escape.
I can't stand to see him hurting just to escape. I want to be the one that he relies on when his day is bad, not a handful of drugs. I want to help him. I want him to feel like I'm enough for him. I need to see him get better.

Despite all that I want, he's no good for me. And I guess I'm no good for him. He has to move on and he has to let me do the same. Maybe one day love will come to him and give him the life he really does deserve. But when we're together nothing good comes from it and I realize this. I just hope he does too and doesn't think I'm doing this because I didn't love him..