GERTY GETS A CUDDLE!
" Okey doke Gerty me little dove!
What colours were ya thinkin`? "
(( Aye aye!..missy!..I`m keepin tight hold of them there bloody savins` ))
" Oh nothin` too bright Berty love..I`m easy! ya know me! "
(( I`ve already seen it pally me awld lad! an I`m havin` it just ya wait and see! ))
" Gerty?!..How about red?..or blue?..Or maybe a nice pea green?! "
(( A soddin` rainbow with pink chuffin` spots!..anythin`..as long as you`re quick..an it`s bloody cheap! ))
" Eee our Berty!..I was thinkin` just a bit darker!..Black and grey perhaps!..but I`m easy! "
(( Ya such a chuffin` awld fashioned fart at bloody times our Berty! ))
" But the old ones black and grey Gerty me little dove...already!! "
(( Blummin` eck woman...I`m not made of soddin` money! ))
" I know it is Berty love!...Oooh!...look at that cuddle chair!
That`s so romantic!!
Look there`s a lovely one over there!
(( I will have me own way!..but easy does it there Gerty girl!..ya nearly bloody there! ))
Ooh look at that one our Berty?...ooh in`t it nice?!
(( Park ya bum Gerty girl!..quick! hide the bloody price! ))
Ooh it`s so cumfy our Berty!..Come ere let`s have a cuddle! "
Berty looks down....!!
(( How bloody much? JESUS STUFFIN`CHRIST!!.It`s soddin` telephone numbers! ))
" Er..have ya seen the price Gerty me little dove?!
Oh come on girl!!..let`s try another! "
(( Oh Lord help me...she`s so like her soddin` mother!! ))
" Hi there!..how can I help you sir? "
(( Oh blummin` eck...he`s lookin` a bit pale!! ))
" Will ya bloody get me out of here?...away from that silly mare! "
" Pardon me? Are you feeling poorly sir? "
(( Oh Lord help me!..I really do need this bloody sale! ))
" Ha ha..oh deary me!!..Take no notice of him lad!..He`s just fine!..he`ll be okay!
Wrap them all up son!..We`ll take the lot!
And don`t forget me cuddle chair..we`ll take them all away today!! "
" I`ll bet that cuddle chair was your idea!..was it sir?!..(wink wink!) "
" Ooh yes!!..My Berty`s a romantic so-an-so!..That`s why we`ve got six kids!..(wink wink!!) "
G xx
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My love Georgina,
You've made me laugh, not once, but fifty times! My favorite line, "Jesus stuffin Christ", broke me up! I told you, I think you would be great at stand-up. What about that well known British Talent Show that discovered Susan Boyle? I can see the headlines now, "Georgina Richardson wins million dollar first prize", and is immediately booked for a large American tour! But, the contract reads, her first stop must be in Florida to visit with "her Linda and Larry"!
Hugs, Love and Kisses,
xox L & L
Of course you would be my first stop and I`d stay for a while too, you`d probably end up throwing me out because I`d drive ya both nuts!!!! I`m glad this got you laughing as that is my mission in life, to make my Larry and my Linda smile at least once a day. I couldn`t do stand up Larry to save me life kiddo, it takes me all me time to remember who that old bag is that always stares back at me with pure confusion in the mirror! I`ve now put a post-it-note on the mirror saying " Yes that`s you G " I can`t even recite any of my work out loud! and I wrote the bloody stuff, I make a mess of it and I can`t remember anything off by heart!! My mother-in-law Emily is fantastic at reciting poetry from memory and she`s just turned 90 this June. She has the most fascinating memory and she`s perfect for telling the kids stories in rhyme, all the rhymes she learned as a child. Now if we could just find a way of bottling her ability!!!!! I`m 60 in September 2017, wouldn`t it be a lovely birthday present if I won the lottery and could afford the tickets so that I could come and stay with you both for a holiday!!! Aaaw!...at least it doesn`t cost anything to dream does it sweetie??!! I`m thinking positive though because I`m one step nearer to getting there as I do have a new passport!!!
I love the bones of ya both
G xx