“Grandma, what the fiddle”

Isn’t it hilarious when the youngun’s think you’ve lost the plot
They say “Mam you are losing your marbles”
Yet I say “No I have not!!”

Oh how it makes me laugh
I’ve been told “You wouldn’t have a clue”
Well I can well assure you my child
I’d know much better than you

They think I’m well passed my sell-by-date
I can see it in their eyes
Huh, I am a computerised encyclopedia 
A mad professor in disguise

“Ask me anything, I will know the answer”
I bravado, blow my own bugal
They say” Okay know-it-all, 
What’s the meaning of ‘Centrifugal?’

I pretend I want to spend a penny
Giving a little jig & a groan
Then I run into the bathroom
& quickly search ‘Centrifugal’ on my phone

As cool as a cucumber
I say “The definition of your word  is to move away from the middle”
Haha my Granddaughter turns to me in amazement & adds”Grandma, what the fiddle”

“You see there is nothing I don’t know, I can tell you anything I moan, It’s as easy as pie”
As I raise my convincing eye
You just look up ‘Google on your phone ?