Him

When I look at him
I feel
Well
I don't know what I feel
I feel like my toes are dug in
Into a soft, velvet carpet
Like the world around me slows down
The clock stops
Frozen in time
Frozen.
I imagine what he smells like
Brownies?
No..
Flowers?
Maybe..
Mustard?
I hope not..
Mustard.
Like the joke we made about yellow.
Jokes.
What is the purpose of a joke?
Is it simply for the connection of two through a giggle?
A smile?
Bonds?
Memories?
Memories.
I have memories with him.
Only placed through the screen.
Like the time we shared a sandwich
Through the screen
Just as we share our connection. 
A screen. 
He’s so far away
I can count the miles
Only
Only if I had hundreds of fingers
Hundreds?
Hundreds.
We’ve spent hundreds of hours together
Laughing
Joking
Resting
Crying
Silence.
The silence when I'm emotional.
It hurts.
Painful.
Pain.
Stop it.
He hurts.
We hurt.
Help.
Someone fix this.
The sun rises
Shades of blue and purple
It's chilly
The sun is yellow.
Yellow.
Like our joke. 
The sun is up.
Conflict roams from the previous night
I want it to end soon
I don’t want to talk.
He feels stupid.
Stupid?
I love his stupidity.
He hates it.
I love it.
I love him?
No.
I love his copper hair
Copper 
Like a penny
But almost gold
Like the sun
As it glistens down upon the dark cities and brings smiles to children and the elderly 
The sun and copper mix looks soft
I want my fingers to wander and get lost in his copper field
It rests over his eyes whilst his body is at peace.
Eyes..
Ocean blue
Like the pacific
Minus the saltiness
Ocean blue with a hint of sun
Metallic yellow, like the sun behind a cloud.
The yellow races around the blue
It leaves dashes and sprinkles of its own trace.
Yellow sits in the ocean of dark blue, like a raft floating at sea.
The abyss in the center of his eyes.
I could drown in his ocean eyes
While searching.
Searching for the gold in his eyes.
Searching for love.
Love?
No.
I could call forever in his abyss. 
In the darkness.
The commitment. 
Intertwined for life.
When I fall into his abyss.
Fall?
Love.
When you are willing to do anything for them.
I’d fall for him. 
I’d take many scrapes and bruises.
But I’d do it for him. 
I’d fall for him. 
In love?
No. 
Falling in love?
Love.
I fell
For him
I love him
From 940 miles away.