How do I live?

How to unlearn snooze buttons?
How to unteach negative mindsets?
How to stop thinking thinking thinking... 
How to turn back into emotions,
And let go of numbers
How to live in the moment,
Instead of the future you meticulously planned,
Since the ripe old age of seven
How do I derail the train of thoughts
Telling me, always, to be efficient
Why can't I live? 
I just want stories to tell
But I'm too scared to create them
The probabilities of a bad ending,
Simply grow
So I ask all the people
People not festering in pools of statistics
How do I live?