How To Know You Are In Your Golden Years

Do you ever say
Hey Doc, would you prescribe, wink, wink, that little blue pill
I am willing to risk a heart attack to get back that old thrill

Do you ever say
I put in my contacts, my reflection to see
Take one look in the mirror
What in the hell happened to me

Do you ever say
I will put on my make up so my skin will have a glow
But will have to get home in a few hours or my make up
Will sink into my skin and my wrinkles will show

Do you ever say
All the gray hairs and wrinkles are a small expense to pay
For all the wisdom I have gained as the years tic toc away

OR did you say
To heck with that, who is the best plastic surgeon you know
Hurry the directions to his office
Maybe there is hope some old beauty the doc can bestow

Do you ever say
My get up and go got up and went
I barely did anything and my energy is spent

Do you ever say
Have to pee all night and will all these aches and pains ever part
Or Hey that was not me, that was you, who let out that fart

Do you ever say
Who was that movie star whose name begins with F
What, what cannot hear you
What, I yelled at you three times already
You must be deaf

Or do you say
Oh what a beautiful day, look at the birds
Bring me my rocker, let me sit down
I am grateful for all the days I smiled
Even the days that brought a frown

Cartoon by Jason Barnard