I don't want this
No one knows what it feels like
To live life this way
To know each day you wake up
And this pain won't go away
I'm a shadow of my former self
The girl I uses to be
Exhaustion and pain
Is what life means to me
I used to fear I wouldn't wake up
To see another day
Now every night I pray for it
To take this life away
I'm tired of being tired
I'm sick of all the pain
The amount of pills I have to take
And still I feel the same
I wish someone would understand
How much this is no life
What kind of mother can I hope to be
How can I be a wife
I didn't choose this life
I cannot walk away
So why would anyone else choose to live this life with me
When I wish I could run away
I wish I could just give up
Without leaving people behind
Why can't my life just give me
One day when it is kind?
I don't know what I could have ever done
To deserve a life like this
No one sees my suffering
Or what little life this is
So tonight I'll close my eyes
And pray it will all go away
Those I leave behind me
Will find a happiness some day
Some may say I'm selfish
That I surely can't care
But they don't know the way I feel
The pain they cannot share
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Comments
Hey YOUR HARLEY!!!..... this is a VERY powerful write.....I used to write poems VERY SIMILAR... as I have a disease that attacks the nerve endings in the body.....I have a 'Spinal Cord Stimulator' implanted on my spine that sends neuro-stimulation to my feet so I can walk with less pain...... I've had 32 surgeries so far.....PAIN has been a constant for 4 years .....pills aren't much of a help as you say in your poem... the reason I'm sharing this with you is because I want you to know how helpful and beneficial the 'family' here on COSMO has been for me and can be for you as well...... you obviously possess a knack for poetry.,,,, this write is delivered with excellent rhythm and timing...... and fine formatting..... there's a strong sense of knowing who you are being conveyed here as well!!..... The anger, hurt, pain, disappointment is laid before the reader BEAUTIFULLY!!......ALL STARS!!..... keep writing, it's a great way to vent..,,and who knows where the power of words will take you..,,,I know its been a game-changer for me....... you have talent dear poet sister!!!...... keep 'em comin'!!......I look forward to reading more from you!!.......LOVE and ROCKETS!!....T xo ?✳✴☀♥???
Thank you. Sorry to hear you are a fellow sufferer I hope your health is at it's best. Your kind words are much appreciated. Love and rockets back at ya xxxxx