I have lost myself
Living with addiction
To not be in control of my own body and soul
To beat my addiction is my huge goal
Due to my addiction I have lost everything in my life
4 beautiful children, a loving family also my home
But worst of all I have lost myself
I hate the person I have become
Once I was such a devoted mom
I had a reason to live
Now pain and guilt is all I live with
I don't want to wake up as I lay down to sleep
The pain and fear it hurts so deep
I pray to my mom who is no longer hear
She passed away from addiction to beer
" please mom help me be free of my drug addiction"
Even the methadone I have on perscription
I want to feel free I long to find the real me
The loving mom I was before
To be drug free I wish for nothing more.
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Comments
Kudos for your structure and versing. You have tons of bravery to post your hardships. I wish you peace and success on your journey to becoming drug-free. Kindest regards. The Fish of the Sea
Thank you so kindly your words mean a lot to me me I am very grateful of your comment thank you all these wonderful comments seemed too good to be true I feel for the first time I'm in years that I am actually a little bit important and it's down to to all the amazing people on this website that I have luckily joined I'm so glad that I I posted on here thank you to all this means the world to me ❤❤❤
Hi Sally...I am so sorry that you have had to go through this. You have written such a heartfelt piece here that I feel a kind of privilege to be able to read it. This is not one of those poems to read, like and leave. This one of those poems that stays with you long, long after reading. Thank you for being brave enough to post this. I wish you every success in your recovery. You are a shing star to be able to write and share this. The first stage to any success is really, really wanting it to happen. The second stage is trying for it. I can tell from this post that you do really and truly want to be free from the hold of the drugs. I can tell that you are trying so hard. Please, please keep trying because with this amount of want and need and effort you will be successful in beating the addiction. I feel sure of it. I dont know you but from what you have written I feel proud of you. You go girl! You go and beat those demons back to where they do not belong. I have faith in you. Please, please keep trying. And keep writing! And keep posting. YOU are amazing and dont let anyone make you believe otherwise. I hope this New Year is a successful one for you 🤞 x
wow 🙂 you don't know how much your message means to me never ever have I I been told that at such positive things about myself it's all normally negative it is hard to to accept as I really don't believe in myself or I don't believe my poems are very good I want to take this opportunity to say how grateful and how much I really really appreciate you taking your time out to message me it really means so much I have tears in my eyes reading this message it has made me feel more positive towards getting off the drugs and for once I am so happy that somebody has actually seen that at each and every single word of what I write is from a heart and it's incredible how you have said it's not a poem that you can just read leave and like it means so much to me you have made my year I really hope the we can stay in contact you are so lovely . I have this addiction but but deep down that girl called Sally is in here somewhere where she is desperate to to separate herself from these demons that are making me so weak that are killing me so slowly that is destroying the only little bit of family I have left my daughter is 26 and she is pregnant and has told me I need to get clean as I cannot see my grandson she said even though it hurts her so much she doesn't want her baby no nanny is a addict and she i understand that and respect her wishes she's also frightened though that because I've been on it for such a long time she is scared that my body would not be able to to take like being normal without the drugs but I've told her that if I take one step at a time I will be fine it's amazing to have somebody to talk to their is a guy on here called Jim who has message me he also said that the poem was very good honestly I really cannot believe your message it seems like a dream come true and how you say you are proud of me 😊that just means so much🌹 it makes me cry I would love to be your friend as I don't have no friends you seem amazing I am so grateful thank you lots of love from Sally Hodgkiss🌹❤
A hand is extended in friendship Sally. I meant every word I said. I know the positive effects that positive words can have, I also know the negative effects that are caused by negativity. I guessed that you probably had little to no positive words offered to you in your life which is why I felt compelled to let you know what a wonderful thing writing is. You do write well and the thing is, if you keep at it you will only get better. I feel sure that with your your determination and some positivity in your life you will beat the addiction. Please interact on here because I believe it will really help you. And I would be honoured to be able to call you my friend x