I just want my daughter back

I’m loosing my mind
Lost track of time
Going to sleep at 4 waking up
At 9
Wipe your face
Face the world
Smile at these white people
With an open sore
Drink and party
Pretend you care
Alcohol don’t make me numb no more
It makes me scared
I’m loosing my mind
Screaming inside
Taking to you with a straight smile
Asking God to change the time
Fast forward I want to see what’s mine
I’m fighting hard 
Can barely breathe 
Panic attacks
Waking up in my sleep
I close my eyes
My heart feels like it stopped 
Take a shot do drugs
I’ll feel alright
I’m coming down i
Just awoke
I’m talking to people 
But inside I choke 
My anxiety high
Thoughts in my mind
Flushing my pills down the toilet
Fighting my own fight
I’ll prove them wrong
And that I did
And now I sleep alone
Holding air like it’s my kid
These cold walls they hold me tight
The wind that blows
Is my kisses at night
Depression sucks
I wanna end it
But something inside me
Says we’re not finished
And if I ever have to take my life 
I won’t go alone and at least I tried