I once knew a man

I once knew a man who was frightened, 
never thought his future would brighten, 
so he took his own life, came back, and took a lot of psychadelics and became enlightened.

Everything he knew of the universe and about himself went out the window,
I'm talking about the death of a mans ego

He was in a dark place and was feeling low, he went crazy, you should have seen him go, flying off the handle because everything he knew became everything he didn't know.

Yeah, talking about memories that he will never forget, as he sits back and tells stories of how him and his love first met, drinking religiously while he's also nervously puffing on his cigarette.

I get it, you know? about how hard those feelings hit? When You choke as if your throat got slit, your heart splits, and your stomache chewing itself to bits because of all the bullshit we have to take in that just didn't fit because nobody gave a shit

I once knew a man 
Who was spiritually awoken from being broken, this mans heart wasn't broken, it was an implosion,
It was his soul that had spoken in silence while his eyes poured out the entire ocean.
 I watched him and his world crumble in slow motion.

I saw him Later that night trying to paint the walls with his past,
He didnt do it because his last thought was how scary it is to see  how easily you couldve ended it all at anytime if you would've just pulled the trigger really fast.

He told me nothing else matters And wished how he should've pulled it faster. 
His heart poured out feelings of blood that was love and couldn't get enough because it was his favorite drug and in the end  before he put the gun to his head he said;
"It's because nobody shows that enough."

He fell to the floor
Telling me and promising me that he wasn't going to try and kill himself anymore because tomorrow could've been the day that he had been waiting for.

I once knew a man
He wasn't a fucking man he was a fucking coward, keeping to himself, closed in and not flourishing like a flower, all because he didn't know how to fucking live and love without her and she had the power to leave and make him cower

Every morning he'd wake up in tears, pouring down like meteor showers. 
So when night time rolls around he'd be Making wishes upon shooting stars for hours and hours with no sleep, no, no sleep,  there's no such thing as sleep for cowards. 

I'm talking about sleepless nights, drunken fights, his skin color is cocaine white from going on coke and oxycodone snorting flights, tripping on acid and thinking about his entire life as he stares off into the moon and the cities bright lights.

 he knew that he was lost forever because she didn't feel the same type of love that he had for her. 

So he picked apart 
his mind with his heart
figuring out life and how to restart and before he did, his mind, heart, body and soul had to depart

Just so he can try to make people understand the feeling of pain that can be put into words written for you to experience in his poetical art.

I once knew a man
He fell in love, it took a moment, just a kiss and a hug 
He closed his eyes 
And felt a little tug 
Turns out he was being shoved into the hole that she dug
He opened his eyes and realized his lips is kissing the bottle deciding how much to chug depending on how much he even gives a fuck.

But he always drank the whole bottle
cause he felt like nobody gives a fuck about him

I once knew a man
I think we all have an idea of who it might be, 
Some people would turn their heads to look and say "hey Javi!" As he smiles And waves back 
but it's the important ones that get to him and tell him "it's ok you'll be fine without me"

Love is blind
And so was I at a certain point of time
I lost my mind from constantly thinking so much for days and nights and people wondered why I wanted to die, 
I wanted to live the dream,
but the dream had me, 
and I saw, I saw that I was living a lie.

So please be kind
Not everyone can take being left behind
It left me confined trying to figure out who I was as a person in life, and trust me, my soul was hard to find.

But I found mine, it just takes a while for your eyes to get used to the dark without your sunshine