I wanted my children to have a voice

You were abandoned by your dad
And he never stood up for you as a father should have
You were controlled by your mother 
Manipulated to do the things she wanted
And no matter what you did 
You never felt good enough 
Cause she always complained
Was never satisfied 
And as a child you thought it was all your fault 
As a child you though- maybe she will notice me 
if I just gave a little more of me
Maybe one day she’ll show that she cares 
Maybe one day I don’t have to fear 
I don’t have to hold back my tears 
I don’t have to put on a smile 
And I don’t have to lie and say I’m fine

Unsafe
Unprotected 
In an environment that you couldn’t runaway from 
You learned early to behave in a way that was pleaseable 
And so the defenses came up
One after one
Until you didn’t even recognize 
The tenth feet wall that you builded around your heart 

A people pleaser, you became
Without even knowing it 
Cause that was just life
And you didn’t even question it

Unconsciously 
A pattern started 
The pain of rejection - you guarded 
It’s never been delt with 
It’s buried deep inside
And He just want to say:
It’s time 
My child

It’s time to feel the wounds all over
It’s time to heal the scars they made
Cause darling - you are not your parents mistakes 
You have a choice to make
You can continue down the same lake
Or you can change its course 
It’s up to you - cause I don’t force 
Whatever you decide - I deeply respect 
Even tho I know what’s best
I created you and wherefore I know what you need 
I knew you before you’d even exist
I knew you before you’d enter this life
I knew it was going to be a tough ride, my child 
You can let me take the burdens 
that’s been on your shoulders
You can let me take every piece 
That’s been stolen
You can let me transform you 
Make you new
My child - there is nothing I can not do
I promise I’ll provide 
You know what to do 
I promise I’ll break through 
And You know in your heart you want to believe it’s true
But It’s hard - cause no one has ever kept their promise 
So why should I?
My love, you’re the reasons why

My sacrifice was heavy
But I’ll do it all again 
Cause if it wasn’t for my son
You couldn’t be cleaned 
If it wasn’t for my son
He couldn’t bring you to me 

Now that’s it’s done
Everyone has a choice 
I wanted my children to have a voice 
Everything you’ve heard about me can’t possibly be true
Cause I’m not cruel 
Am not the God people expect I am
But if you want - I’ll show you who I truly am
I want you to know me
I want to reveal the truth 
I want you to be free from your generations roots

I was there the moment it all happened 
I was there through all of your nightmares 
With sweat and tears 
I was there - in all of your fears 
And my heart cried 
I wanted to interfere 
But that’s not my character 
In time you’ll understand 

I am battling for your life
It’s important that you know 
Cause what they have for you 
Is not at all good

You don’t need to play a part
All I want is your heart 
You don’t need to worry about 
The things am gonna do 
I have a plan and my plans is in store for you

I want you to bloom
I want you to shine 
I want to make the smilie on your face come alive 
I want to hear your laughter 
From deep within 
I want you to understand that I’ve already won the fight 
My son was burried 
Raised to life 
the work is done
His mission complete 
Now there’s access for you to reach me

You just have to rest
And let me do what I do best 
Clearing the way
Rewriting the story
Letting in all of my glory 
Receive and receive
Your cup overflows 
I’ll restore broken things 
And make them whole