I wish

I wish I'd never met you
Then I would not know pain this intense
I wish I had amnesia
So the memories no longer haunted me
I wish that I could flip a switch and change what happened
Then I could be happy
I wish that I was what you wanted
Then I would have self-esteem
I wish I had not acted as if it was no big deal to me
Then you would know the true depth of my feelings
I wish I could hate you
So I could let you go 
Yet no matter what I wish they are exactly that wishes.