If she only knew

If only she knew how much i cry at night. 
If she only knew how much i truly fight. 
To keep a happy face though my life is dim. 
If she only knew that because of him, my biggest fear is men. 
If she only knew how many times I went to the door every single time she thought it okay to call me a whore. 
If she only knew about the gun over christmas last year. 
How my uncle was terribly close to me afraid she may hear. 
if she only knew my time is running out. 
A lettee from her youngest the screams for help your voice is drowning out.