If You Die In An Elevator

If you happen to die in an elevator
Be sure to push “UP” before you go
I know a man who surely panicked
Pushed “DOWN”, wound up with Satan below

Tried to explain to Satan what happened
Pushed the “DOWN” button by mistake
The Pearly Gates was where he wanted to go
Begged Satan to give him a break

Said he always had lived an exemplary life
Was kind and generous most times
He once stole some candy from a baby though
But he's tried to put that behind

“Sorry,” said Satan, “I've got hold of you now
Won't let you out of my sight
My rules down here are strict and simple
You pay for your sins forthright!”

“But what if I can guarantee a special treat?”
“What are you offering, my friend?”
“A night of passion with Kim Kardashian”
On his way to Heaven, he did wend!