in that wakeful daze

If I stand on my tiptoes I can see a good night’s sleep
I can’t quite reach it but I’m sure I might before the morning creeps
It hides from me as if I’m counting from behind a tree
I can’t get it to understand I want it to find me

It’s like I’m skating constantly between awake and dreaming
Exhaustion takes its toll on me my sanity is screaming
It blows its fuse and finds its calm and bliss finds me instead
My brain shuts down and hears no sound but thoughts in my own head

But still no rest I try to dream but constantly I’m thinking
And that just makes it hard to close off without heavy drinking
Which I don’t like so I can’t do my options limit me
This overthinking pit I’m in is causing sleepless misery

I need to shut the world out temporarily to mend
I need this sleep to find me and to love me, be my friend
I wish it wouldn’t run away I’m longing for its care
I hope one day it just stays still so I can meet it there

I’m sure they say that hurt or loss is something you should sleep through
Supposedly it benefits to do the things that heal you
So I’ll keep chasing and keep hoping, I won’t give up trying
Until I’m sleeping through this pain and dreaming that I’m flying