Poem -
Married!
Four females in my life,
3 females let me go,
2 females helped,
1 female held on.
Not one my mom, she’s dead to me, not because I don’t love her and or care about her, but because she still doesn’t love herself!Â
She’s not taking this one away from me, she’s not evoking a third wheel, she’s not willing to let me be happy, she hasn’t been a mom.
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Comments
I am lost for words here Rob...sad for your losses and happy too...for your gains...
you are doing so well in your struggle to make sense of the senseless...hugs x
When you are as mentally traumatized and brain fucked as bad as I am… you got to make decisions off feelings and love, your heart will lead your brain. My mind screams danger at everything… dangerous things, loving things, sad things… it’s in survival mode. Jennifer ( my ex ) allowed me to see it and realize the change, Kayleen has accepted me, ALL SHADES and that has motivated me to want to change even more, because she deserves it and my son does and so do I. Without Jennifer I would’ve scared Kayleen away, I’ll always miss Jenn and Kayleen respects and understands that because she knows my past and all the good, bad and ugly.
As my feelings lead me into safer situations my brain starts to absorb the difference between what was and what is now and why it’s ok to feel safe and it’s ok to be happy.Â