Me

There are some riddles 
I cannot crack 
 Some words I’m hesitant to say
Some things in which fear
Has the upper hand.
My life painted grey
By the artist so complex
I cannot figure her out
Beats me when I say
She is I yet not me in many ways.
All the things I can do
And the things I wanna
And the only one restraining me, me.
It aint too hard they say
As they watch you tip the scales
A little run here
A jog there
To get you back into shape
Back into the cloak of normalcy
Away from judging stares
Even from those you’ve come to trust
When those wandering eyes
Get the upper hand you wonder
As you stare at
What they’re looking at
How can I love myself
When all they ask me is to change?
I haven’t got all the answers
I’m very much lost
In this labyrinth
Of society’s paradigms
The rule book to fit right in.
But I’m not alone
I see what you see
And much more
I see my mother’s integrity
and my father’s principles
and my sister’s strength
and my brother’s sweetness
Above all I see myself for what I am
Not what you deem me to be