My conversation with the Master

Dear Lord, it's me again pulling on your coat tails..in dire need of mentorship guidance and details...about the direction my life is going and the choices that I've made...wondering if there's a small possibility that this poor soul can be saved...

You gave me great strength and wisdom throughout my career as a Soldier and blessed me with the power to lead..you gave me the courage to invade nations abroad and defend its citizens and my country and ensured I would succeed....You gave me the power to leave my Soldiers through hell and back time and time again...You blessed me to survive bullets and bombs and terrorists through all near death experiences....

You protected the young lives placed in my hands and directed me to lead the way...time and time again you reminding me that you are the truth, the light and the way.....whenever I had a shadow of a doubt that I was strong enough to follow through... you showed me a different level of strength and commanded me to have faith in you....

Yet Lord I still struggle with this power you've given me cause it makes me have to choose.. between being a super indestructable Soldier and a loyal faithful servant to you...Lord you tell me to strike fear into those who wish to bring destruction and cause harm to the your countrymen....yet if I kill it's a contridiction to your words in the Commandment...

I battle my demons on a daily basis, and question the decisions Ive made, yet I never question the abilities you blessed me with or all the many second chances you've gave..So Lord I'm asking that you forgive me in a sense for using the blessings you gave me to disobey, yet I'm glad you bless me and allow me to be great.....I thank you In Jesus name we Pray