In My Head

~~In my Head
Im the one you never expect to hurt or feel bad
Im suppose to smile and only laugh
I cant break down or even show a frown
And god knows I cant be stressed out
Im like a blue print mapped out by society
With all the people around I know half don’t feel love me
Im only suppose to help you
And gain nothing in return
Im suppose to wipe your tears
And dry my own
I cant talk about problems because for me they shouldn’t exist
I cant feel pain or be lost and confused
I have to be perfect or atleast make society believe I am
When really im torn down
Beaten and abused
Longing for someone to say
“hey let me help you”
Im facing all these walls that ill never tair down
And im running from problems that in that way will
Never be solved
I smile because im broken and I don’t want anyone to see
That just like everyone else apart of me is dying
I laugh because its easy
I listen to others problems because it makes me feel good
 Knowing im not alone
But im always fighting myself
Im in a never ending war inside my head
It’s the beginning of depression
Im waiting to see who cares
 I long for someone to wipe away my tears
Someone anyone please save me from myself
Tommorrw ill smile just because I can
Even though im hurting inside myself
Ill listen to some drama
And laugh away some tears
Then at night ill fall
Apart all by myself
Again

By: Barbara Ramos Wrote Jan.12,2014