New Years Promise

I've made a promise,
one I cannot break,
to a heart,
so fragile,
I cannot break,
to him,
for him,
I have dropped old habits,
of destroying myself,
of taking myself away.
I have stopped,
no longer healing myself,
for brief moments,
but letting the pain take hold,
because with that pain,
there is no guilt,
only reality,
as I am,
only us,
in a tangle of lost heat,
in the bitter cold,
we hold on,
to that promise.
The thing that binds us,
glues us to one and other,
lets us hear the darkness,
but no longer let it in,
just hold on so tightly,
that no one can deny us,
you hold me to the promise,
forcing me to see the light,
letting me hold on.
This promise,
for you,
to stop the pain,
lets me see a new beginning,
and hold on,
for this new year,
with new body,
no more pain,
just a promise,
to stop breaking the skin,
for you,
to stop the darkness coming back,
to see the light,
this promise,
hols me to you.