No One Wants to be Alone

There are many people in this world that go through life posing as if we are better alone. We are like this for one reason or another, but it all ties in with the ideology that there is no one truly for us. To cope with being alone, we say things like how it’s more peaceful, less distracting, or even just safer to go through our days by ourselves. In reality, we just haven’t found that person, or those friends, that we truly feel will be able to accept us to the fullest extent. We feel that way because we have a past of failing, a past of being hurt, or just simply being left by someone when we showed them who we truly are. When presented with how much “baggage” we bring with us, whether if it’s from past experiences, past relationships, past life lessons, or even if it’s genuine love and optimistic hope that this time, that this person, will be the one, but then they eventually end up deserting us. After acknowledging who we are, and what we bring, they couldn’t or just didn’t want to be the ones to be there for us for one reason or another, regardless of what they are. Due to that, we refrain from trying to make many friends and just look for one or a couple that can accept AT LEAST 65% of us, which makes it even harder on us. The number “65” comes from it being around the threshold of showing minimum interest, but not too much to scare them away. We have to refrain from showing anything more than that, we can’t show how much we truly care about them. Even with holding back about how much we truly care, finding someone who is willing to accept that 65% is like trying to find a specific needle in a haystack, but the haystack is made entirely of needles as well. In other words, literally ANYONE could fill the position as long as they are willing to accept us, and what comes with us. Even when we find people who aren’t the most compatible with us, or even take advantage, we may stick with them due to weakness. The thought of having something that wasn’t exactly what we were looking for, is better than not having anything at all, so we stay a little longer in situations that we know isn’t the best for us. We know that if we end it, we’ll be back to being alone again, stripped away from something we haven’t had in a while or for some of us, ever. Most of us tend to stick it out with that person or those people until they end up leaving us. Leaving us with another reason to wanting to be alone so we won’t be hurt again. Even though we weren’t compatible together, the idea/mentality that came with having someone brought us hope, and that hope that was taken away, brings pain. When most humans are born into the world we are held. Held closely by the ones that brought us to this world, and they comfort us for the time being. That simple action tells us that, whatever our future is we will be supported by the ones that love us. We strive to find that comfort that we once felt when we came into this world. Sadly, as we get older, the ones that presented us with that sense of belonging, pass away at some point. Then there are those whose relationships with us decay over time. With that, we seek others that can take their place and fill the void in our life. We seek others that can comfort us and approve of us, and make us feel welcomed. We pose as if being alone is better, as if it’s empowering, that it makes us stronger. We feed ourselves these statements and go on about our days by ourselves, until we are finally numb to the reality that we are alone. It’s never a 100% successful process because everywhere we go we are presented with hundreds, thousands, maybe even tens of thousands of people every single week, whether if it’s in-person or online, that was actually able to find someone. Whether if it’s just a friend or a significant other, they successfully were able to find someone to be with them for the rest of their lives. Presented with that, our numbness deteriorates and we feel the feelings that we trained so hard to suppress. We wonder, when and if it will ever be our time. In reality, no one truly wants to be alone…   
  
I am alone…