Poem -

Petsmart stratagem employed to generate business

Petsmart stratagem employed to generate business

Upon Googling Petco
regarding purchasing gift card
for eldest daughter
(she tends two beautiful female felines)
Petsmart website appeared right and center
innocuously distracting purported intent.

The nearest latter named store
approximately a dozen plus miles away
whereas former specialty shop
in closer proximity to her,
she (first born offspring),
who resides within Oakland, California.

I readily admit envisioning
gamut of goodies
(to enhance Felis catus existence),
whence yours truly
easily self hypnotized himself
into catatonic trance
while drooling over plethora of
goodies to accessorize pet life.

Alumni school of hard knocks
learned forty dollar life lesson
(twenty smackaroos allotted
each competing purveyor
of similar pet merchandise.

Website designers masterfully
employ machiavellian (cutthroat) tactics
to snatch up business
when an online shopper
scouting around for any product.

Businesses cater to shoppers
seeking any particular product
must activate, facilitate,
and integrate subterfuge
(obviously exercising subtle techniques)

to hoodwink savvy netizen
confidently kickstarting and buzzfeeding
insatiable pinteresting itsy bitsy
(spidery) prodigal son wannabe hankering
to splurge on themselves,
viz their pet peeve.

Even with earlier premeditated notion in mind
to secure gift card for Eden (said progeny),
predilection toward easy distraction
found me admitting aforementioned faux pas,

which spurs (Matthew Scott's)
quasi crazy corollary
subsequently stated thus,
when deliberate focus absent
obviously good n plenti (of fishy)

opportunities thrives affording advertisements
expedient modus operandi
to bandy, dangle, and features wares
eliciting, emancipating, enticing
yours truly, who drooled and slobbered

suddenly spurred with Pavlovian craving
to whip out debit card (whip it good)
and surrender sparse monies
to plunk down electronically x dollars,
whereby another citizen banker bit the dust.

Overzealous to feign
being monetarily gifted
faux lavishing self with impulse buying
justified as early Holiday,
(viz Xmas) shopping,
(no matter I suffer agoraphobia)
figuratively ran counter
to credo of frugal lifestyle.

Impossible mission
to wrench free and clear,
where penury indelibly
(albeit figuratively) writ large
across precarious teetering complex edifice
there's a sucker born every minute,
and ye espy the latest one freshly minted.
 

Like 0 Pin it 0
Support CosmoFunnel.com

Support CosmoFunnel.com

You can help support the upkeep of CosmoFunnel.com via PayPal.

Log in to leave a comment.
Poem -

I could never imagine...

I could never imagine...

within wildest dreams of mine
(a side affect from
one or more
of the nine prescription...

Poem -

Yours truly a tried and...

Yours truly a tried and true (no Keaton) Philly buster

boot not so suburb (superb)
Prone to bloviation pure and simple
rides on figurative high...

Poem -

The benefit of a hussy...

The benefit of a hussy without being married

Hyperbole taken to the mad max
mayhem when necessary
to, poeticize, publicize,
...

Latest poems in Comedy, Drama, Epic, Freestyle, Speculative

Poem -

SHE COULDN'T STAY

SHE COULDN'T STAY

From a little girl to her Mommy and Daddy...

​​​​​​Thank you for all the fun times we had......

Poem -

Daddy's Been Gone

S.D. #3

Daddy's been gone for years now
Daddy's been missing in action

Daddy left because of his new...

Poem -

Now Is The Time...

Now Is The Time...

Dragons illuminate mountains of mystery,
Castles dressed in ancient mythology,
Echoes...

Advertise on CosmoFunnel.com