Melting Popsicle

I tried
really freaking hard 
tongue tied 
no reply 
Looooong sighhhhh
brain fried 
emotions discard
to the side 
soul died 
problems pryed 
whyyyy God whyyyyy
I quit 
throw the towel in 
straight lit 
burned wick 
both sides 
feelings hide 
no room to sit down
heart lied 
Im tired 
fired up 
sirens ruuuuun 
I'm done 
nine one one 
collapsed lungs 
life stung, brung
hung subconscious
abnoxious mindset 
gifted talent 
captive to flesh 
I'm not who I am 
befriend reflections 
selections made 
parts played 
patterns stayed 
when will I feel 
okaaaay saaaaay 
sooooon pleeeease 
hellp deal, steal me 
awaaaay, todaaaay
this isn't a game 
regain trainwreck 
breathing becoming 
difficult, hurting 
flirting with death 
chest caved in 
slaved to 
past pain 
insane within this 
membrane...laaaaaame
saaaaame, aaaage old 
situations, validations 
never appearing promising 
pinky swear mixed with glares cares go unnoticed
clouded with distortion 
darkness stares 
fares piling up 
tolls avoided 
polls divided
anger subsidized
privatized issues 
tissues  by the box full
absorbing alcohol 
leaving dryness from 
lack of softness 
this is a mess 
where's bounty 
quicker picker upper 
pieces shattered 
heart splattered 
eyeliner upside down 
war paint 
this kind, this mind 
of mine, not for the 
faaaaaaaint, aaaaaint
you feeling better 
from my ugly treasure 
no map necessary 
these valuables planted 
at my feet, repeat, download 
discrete fecal matter 
scatter this out, doubt 
trapped inside and out 
leave this world 
in a body bag 
blood fills up 
the well to hell 
your asking to much 
for your soul 
reeeeetreeeeat, defeeeeeat
no compete clause 
floss the debris 
these traumatic non-diplomatic, sporadic, hypnotic, anti-value, shattered glass.....moral compass, failure to launch, trigger pulled grenade.....explode 
ticking time bomb
threats, let's set this off
battles scatter, wars pour
from the door 
knock hard 
go away, today now, gone 
not not double negative these words fumbling from a fragile brain, train the waves never to leave the bubble, keep them coming, stop running in the hall, tall mental strain, short fuse, trapped abuse, hung from the nooose...traveling by caboooooose looooose the 
attituuuuude, duuuuuude
rude , quiet down, riot stuck
no luck , inside voice now, how laaaaaame, taaaaame 
yourselfffffff, helllllllllp meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
screeeeeeeeeeeeeam
meeeeeeeeeeeeean
gleeeeeeeeeeeam
but don't shine 
bright, light ignite 
charcoals refuse 
infuse substance abuse 
now that's a flame 
comfort warms
comfort warns
delay of reaction 
two hour delay 
recess school's out 
I learned all the shit they didn't teach me THE HARD WAY 
literally fade the black cascade , fake brovado 
middle class movado 
bravo , he go round and round, rodeo , big steer, lightyears ahead, bread, loafs of lacked love, feast on these carbs, toast, spread , peanut butter jelly time, slime , lime placed on the rim, keep em coming , I'm fuming at the ears , fears, peers not had, relatable a false illusion to bitter for babysitter to keep an eye on , funded friendship for future fam, damn this is alot of slots to fill up with cots of thoughts sleeping ....laid to rest, r.i.p this minute in 61 seconds it'll be over , can't stop the world from turning but can leave it for good, rocket juice, who's coming with , plastic tubes room temperature placed in a freezer box once but now removed , melting cheer to frowns just look in the mirror ! MAN DOWN