Reflection Perfection

I can almost touch you 
Miss reflection in the mirror 
but though I desperately long 
to find something to hold on 
You decide to dissapear 
I see you almost
in a future tense
but not quite there yet 
I feel like there was a time
where we have already met 
but don't take my word for it
I'm looking through the looking glass
but see no Alice 
Just when I'm about to pass
I see a face of michivious malice
The sight of it is faded and not very strong
truth of the matter 
I've been the mad hatter 
all along. 
Working on his art 
that ultimatly made him mad 
But in the end he's dillusionally 
happy with the only thing he had.
Am I the same? 
I do get lost in it so much
that bits of my soul 
decorate it as such
But I'm not quite yet 
to where I think I should be 
there's a dissconnect 
An invincible wall made by yours truly 
made out of glass 
and an image I worship 
of a better version of me-
who's like me but with a tune up
Better at existing
Better at life 
Better at words
Better with strife
Better with actions
Better with lead 
Better to look at 
Better to need
And try as I might I can't break through
I take a hammer and a knife 
but no marks are made 
And I don't know what to do
The world screams "be better"
when its nothing but a dirty hypocrit 
because its only getting worse
and I've had it up to here with it.
No I can't be that reflection you so wish me to be 
even if I tried
If I told you once I could be perfect 
then sorry but...I lied.
I will strive to be the reflection 
My king can be proud of 
not something that merely looks good 
but one that matters 
Stab me with forgiveness
Until I shatter 
then he'll pick up the pieces 
and gleam them until they're clear 
I am not a dirty puddle 
I was solidified as a sun shining earth quacking chandler
My heart and my art are one in the same 
My art is the glass my heart is the frame  
my craft has been re crafted
And I needed to be reminded
the mirror that I'm looking into
is simply where my mind has been 
The real me is not an image or something copied
for my wick as been lit 
and nothing can stop me 
I am the real thing- ME in actuality 
so no need to dream anymore of what 
"I SHOULD be."  
There's no need to dream about what should be in the mirror
The most important thing is reality 
and reality is right here
divine decree
dipped in serendipity
is inevitability
My intertwined destiny