sleeping ?

Thoughts are stuck 
Words are swallowed 
Not one for luck 
Even when borrowed 
My heart is aching 
And I’m still waiting 
But nothing is changing 

I need a domino effect 
Of dreams colliding 
Instead they’re disapating 
The pile keeps on piling 
I worry to much about dollars 
And not enough about changing 

So what have I become the villain? 
I struggle to live and give everything I have to give 
Because I need to survive by making a killing 
Killing of my dreams to make the man happy 
When all I wanna do is dream and make my man happy 

But no; I need to eat 
So I’ve already sold my soul 
For a some milk and a bowl of Cheerios 
So I can keep feeding my insides  
yeah it’s full alright - full of holes
I’ve got a roof over my head tho 
And it’s important I know 

I’ll never take it for granted 
but some days I wish I could get away with a sleeping bag 
on some hills with forget me nots
And worry about nothing but giving what my souls got 

Because if I were to die it wouldn’t be pitiful 
Because sorrounding me would be peteled things 
Who aren’t very forgetful 

And that’s better than a tombstone of gold silver and ember 
Simply because all I’ve ever wanted is to be remembered 

My finger tips tickle 
As I remember who I am 
I wasn’t made for a career 
And a five year plan 
I was made for some much more 
Then simply being human 

I’m intended to be inventive 
And to enlighten only what I can 
I wasn’t made to be a examined and planned into a program for man 

My circuits are hardwired to only express
Reterics that are metoriphocal  
I speak in riddles galore and 
Metaphors that are rhetorical 

Simply put 
Everything I’m thinking is most likely an illusion 
I’m a poor girl who dreams of worlds soaked in her delusions 

It’s easy to forget when you focus on the regrettable 
I almost forget that as long I  remember who I am
I’ll never truly be forgettable 

I can feel you through these thoughts of mine 
In whatever universe in whichever time 
Tilting your head from side to side 
Thinking of how ridiculous the idea 
and how silly the lines 

And yet... there’s parts of you that ponders
my reality calls and your feet move forward because you can’t help but wander  

In a daze you glance into my eyes 
They’re wide open; and take you by surprise 
Because maybe all this time...

Maybe I’m the one who’s dreams are worth keeping 
Maybe reality is best when you refuse to stop dreaming 
Maybe your eyelids are closed because you stopped believing 
Maybe this whole time I’m the one who’s been awake 

And you’ve been the one sleeping