Requisite inspection November 24th, 2020 at Apartment B44

Countdown triggers nails
bitten down to quick
geesh if only Mary Poppins
could pull off cheap trick
or think super tramping Glinda courtesy
film Wizard of Oz
Good Witch of the North
riding at light speed in nick
of time travelling on her

state of the art broomstick
unfortunately they long since retired courtesy
formerly the Banks residence rather slick
at 17 Cherry Tree Lane, London England
ruler of the Quadling Country
South of the Emerald City,
and protector of Princess Ozma
holed up in their respective bailiwick.

Aforementioned and following
(little known) verses (of Matthew)
find me peevish
at our (the missus and mine) digs
2 Highland Manor Drive

between 9:00 A.M. and 12:00 P.M.,
cuz low income housing regulations
require safe and secure place to live,
hence unpleasant inspection
scheduled at least once per year.

A trio of persons
comprising Property Manager
Regional Property Manager
and Maintenance Man
rap on the door (cue suspenseful music)
before their collective gaze turns toward:
the kitchenette, stealing
a peek into refrigerator, stove,

cupboards, testing garbage disposal
assessing utility room
housing hot water heater
testing smoke detector in bedroom
scanning bathroom
all the while reserving right
to take pictures
inside our unit if necessary.

No matter the missus and me
experienced aforementioned inspection
at least three other instances
since we lived here circa July 1st, 2016
(plus or minus a decade - ha)
which state inspection
explains metered emission
synonymous with violation,

whereby absolute zero
personal property we utilize
not considered off limits
to inquisitive troupe constituting
above identified higher ups
(refer to lines 33, 34, and 35
yes - start counting
from tippy top of poem).

Now no more time for inane verse,
cuz tis down to brass tacks
yours truly cannot relax
until he and the wife
align figurative ducks

courtesy ventriloquism acts
issues convincing quacks,
plus suddenly magically enlivened
neatly arrayed knickknacks
threatened with receiving

bonafide paddy whacks
if said tchotchkes misbehave
and exhibit buffoonish antics
subsequently summoned,
instructed, and commanded

to complete x squared jumping jacks
otherwise sent to fabled boot camp
superfluous unwanted playthings
recruited by Salvation Army
filling out ranks of toy story barracks.