R.I.P dad

You look at me 
I stare at the ground 
Not from fear 
but rather disgust 
You look at me 
I could careless
I wish it was different 
but I cannot undo 
All the pain you caused 
all the lack of love 
You look at me 
only from photos now 
You're dead to me 
I hold my head high 
Only looking up 
because I deserve to
I cannot love you 
for all the scars caused
You made me learn
everything on my own 
In fact I taught you 
solely from trial and error 
Not because I wanted to
but because I had to survive 
You look at me 
but never in my eyes 
Because you don't deserve me
nor ever loved me right