Surrender

I heard it repeating,
that voice in my ear,
and  wondered once more 
if redemption was near.
It seemed to get louder
then faded away..
No, that’s not redemption
I’m hearing today!

It lingers around in 
my cochlear womb.
Its muted words screaming
in that vacuumed tomb.
I can’t or I don’t
Want to hear it out loud,
I guess it’s unlikely
to make me feel proud

It’s there all the time
with it’s deep throaty hiss,
creeps  inside my thoughts
like an unwelcomed kiss.
Distraction just fails to
keep it’s voice away,
it screams through the night
and most of the day.

It keeps on repeating
demanding a voice,
I’m feeling so weak now
I don’t have a choice.
I bit my lips hard,
it brings tears to my eyes,
and  although I WAS right..
I will  apologise!