Survivor

The night he took my innocence.

Was the night everything changed.

His shirt had been my favorite color,

A color that I can no longer bare to see.

His laugh,

So pure and happy,

Now haunts my every dream.

Those big blue eyes,

I had once looked at in awe,

Instill a new kind of fear in me,

Each time I see his eyes,

In a new friendly face.

The smell of his cologne,

I had loved so much

Is now revolting.

I was so naïve,

Young and trusting,

And he stole the small amount of innocence,

That I had left.

I will never trust again,

And I will always look behind me,

Fearing who may be there.

They told me it was my fault,

I should have listened,

To what I’d always been taught.

Cover up before you go out,

Don’t accept drinks from strangers,

Stay close to your friends.

But in the moment,

It all seemed right.

He was kind,

His eyes were warm,

And he paid attention to my every word,

Making me feel special,

A feeling that I wasn’t used to.

So like a child,

I trusted his charm.

I would give anything,

To take back my innocence,

To go back and try again.

To cover up,

To make my own drinks,

To stay close to my friends.

But I didn’t,

And I will never get back,

What I left in his bed.

I will keep the memory,

And the paralyzing fear,

Until I become stronger.

Strong enough to realize,

That It wasn’t my fault,

That there was nothing I could’ve done,

And that he was the only one that could’ve stopped it.

The night that ruined my life,

Was all in a stranger’s hands,

In his charming words,

And his breaking touch.

One day I will have the satisfaction of knowing,

That despite his efforts,

He didn’t ruin me,

I survived.