Poem -
Suvla skies
Under Suvla skies
young Paddy did die
a mother's only son,
from Dublin town
a shilling from a crown
can feed a hungry one,
in those angry years
through the fears
for empire he did fight,
but all he did see
down at Gallipoli
was the fading of the light.
On an Easter morn
a nation was born
as Pearse did declare,
on Dublin's streets
the fate that martyrs meet
so bravely did they dare,
but a nation's pride
swept so many aside
as the parade went marching by,
only when we reflect
do we pay our respect
to those that died under Suvla skies.
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Comments
Outstand details, 5 stars all the way, really good job.
Favorite part:
Could you give me more information about the battle and the year it was in. Or, if there are names in the poem, could you clarify for me who they are and what they bring to the story. Thank you for helping me fully grasp the story, it was well written.
This was the second war poem I read on Cosmo, it is one of my favorites.
I think you could make the poem even better, with more details that show the battle/year it happened, if fiction could make up the year. I think. You could also add a Notes area at the bottom of the poem, to provide more details. Okay, food for thought. You have a voice on the page, a very strong one. Soar on, keep writing.
Thank you for your feedback, the poem concerns the failed Gallipoli beach campaign by Allied forces on Turkey during WW1 in 1915 and the poem refers to a hypothetical, nameless Irish soldier in memory of the many Irish men who died then. The poem then refers to the 1916 Easter Rising by Irish rebels against British rule and Padraig Pearse one of its leaders, all of whom were executed in the wake of its failure. The poem then goes on to acknowledge how the Irish state in it's infancy unjustly gave adverse acknowledgement of Irish people who fought for the crown forces then. Hope this answers your question and happy reading.
Truly amazing detail, in your poem and in your response. It was well written; you could add your reply in the lower half of your poem under at: Notes section. I'm intrigued about poems that deal with war, especially from veterans as I've never served. I wanted to in my early years but I never had the mind for serving in a battle.
I wrote one war story / lyric poem called: WAS IT ALL IN VAIN. I posted it here for review. It's more of a story about young children on both sides of a war. Hope you take a look at it, it's a "mother's perspective" on all wars. I wanted to join the Navy when I was young, but God sent me on a different path, having children instead.
Thanks again for providing such rich and fascinating details. You should add it into the bottom of the poem.
Happy New Year
Full of new poems.
Thank you