The Behind It All

The pain behind this is that I only want you. Like that rainy day that doesn’t go away and you want the sky to be blue. You ain’t ready to talk to me, hell I wouldn’t be ready to talk to me too. It’s crazy the decisions made by me lead back to you. And to your certification you’re a gift and amazing, to be a present in my presence is better than any decision that I could’ve made true. I’ve spent days learning myself and paying attention and in the end I’ve paid due. I roll over every night to an empty spot thinking of you. 

It’s pains me to still think about who you are and what you worth. To me you cost a lot but I had to thicken the plot which is why my head hurt. 

It’s sad the condition I left my chest in. I mean wiring blood to the veins is what I do best in. I try to lessen the damage that I was handling. Even though the choice was mine to make it that way it’s still hard to manage but I try and I’ll try again. My thoughts pass me by they in love with the wind. You stayed where you were, where my love for you begin. 

It’s pains me to still think about who you are and what you worth. To me you cost a lot but I had to thicken the plot which is why my heart hurt.

We were bonded, not by contract, not by blood there was something more imperial. A prince cloaked in darkness prayed for a princess who brought light so what we had was spiritual. I saw the light for the first time when I stopped dreaming cause there was nothing to be afraid of anymore it became a miracle. We share something so big to us but to gods sooo immaterial. 

It’s pains me to still think about who you are and what you worth. To me you cost a lot but I had to thicken the plot which is why my soul hurt.

I’ve painted a mural of this whole thing trying to find the cause. I wounded myself every night I change the gauze. This domino effect is why everything has dropped but I was the last one to fall. I couldn’t see that I was the bigger picture, that wanting you or another you but simply cannot is the pain behind it all.