The Way That I Feel

I want to have fun, I want to laugh, I want to love, I want to smile
I want to have excitement and feel the warmth inside me for a while.

I want to look forward to something amazing, something exciting, something real
I want to feel anything, anything but this, the way that I feel.

I feel empty, I feel lonely, I feel lost and in despair,
I've never felt anything like this before, it is too painful to wear...

...on my shoulders each day and in my head constantly reminded, 
that I am now on my own, I must start again, but with no rewinding...

..of the clocks to when I was younger with no cares or memories...
of what it is like to be loved, feel loved, and to love with ease.

"Take one day at a time", I must "not run before I can walk"
"Time is a healer" "onwards and upwards", I "must remember to talk"

I know all these are right, I know one day I'll be fine
But right now I feel like I'm hanging onto the end of a line.

'One day' I'll be myself, I'll find that sparkle and be me
It just seems so far away that 'One day' but my family help me see...

...just how much I am loved and cared for in every possible way,
So if anything can bring me back it is them, who I love and adore every day!