This Canadian Dude

Silly old duffer, this Canadian dude
His name is Jester Jack Ellison
Those guys in white coats try real hard
To keep him sedated and bedridden

Don't dare let him let loose in public
For fear he might cause some harm
To ordinary people walking the streets
Making farting sounds under his arm

That's not as bad as pulling their hair
Or sticking his finger up their nose
Maybe annoying but harmless I guess
It's really not too bad I suppose

But when he sneaks up behind you
And yanks off your brand new hair piece
That's when we should draw the line
Call the fuzz to get him to cease

Silly old duffer, he means no harm
Just wants some love and attention
At 82, people think he's over-the-hill
Hopefully he's been given an extension