To give you hope

I write my poems at 4 am
Lack of daylight 
Seems to be the chance for inspiration
Cause the spotlight
Is focused on the monsters 
Who refuse to show themselves in sunlight 

Secrets we hold tight
But don't have the strength to grasp when the days become nights 

So I write
Words through different letters 
To try to communicate
My oppression 
But I'm not oppressed until I allow the weight to press down on my heart
In the shape of regrets and mistakes
I hold my hands up and pray
For sunlight 

Some right
In a world where I can only see wrong

But I can't feed the hungry with my words 
I can't build them shelter with sentence structures 

Or warm them
From the cold air 
By losing sleep wondering if I should just take the chance 

Let the monsters loose and see where they take me
Set them free and follow behind them
Closely 
Holding my breath 
Praying the night won't end 
Quietly 
Listening to what they tell me

That there's always someone in need of saving 
And I can't save them all 

So I might as well stay focused on saving myself
Cause every mistake leads to a consequence

Consciousness keeps me hoping for a hope I can hang on to 
Keeps me praying for a prayer I can pray for you 
Yearning for a gift I can give to you

Cause my words might not feed your hunger tonight 
And my sentences won't give you safety

The fire in my veins races to my heart
And I breathe it out through my hands 
Or a pen

they become words

And it's still night but now the light is peaking through the window promising to kill the monsters if I open my eyes

But I'd take the chance to lose everything I'd hoped 
If I could give you just that,

Hope.