Today

Perhaps watching me sit and bleed isn’t easy
Had you taken two seconds to hear and believe me
When I say that I am different
From all other poems and paintings Of tear drops and sadness 
And you wipe me away with a tissue to cover me up with a smile
You say “deep down is a happy girl” but where the hell is she hiding? Because I’ve spent years on adventures deep in my soul
Cutting down names and memories in my path
As I try to forget
And to remember
All that I once was before my heart had been shattered like bullet proof glass that 
I had built up in layers
Gone in one blast 
With a wicked explosion 
But you wouldn’t see
A silenced gun to my head
A lethal injection that kills me    slower     than     time 
It chips at my heart with a chisel
Carving nicknames and scars
That once bled from my wrist
All in good fun but not expecting the twist
When I’ve had it 
When I’ve become too exhausted to keep marching
But you will look at me limp and go on with your carving