Trapped

I have many feelings that are trapped
I try to scream but no one hears me
Have I lost my mind? Have I finally snapped?
Have I come to accept a false reality?
I will never know as I am completely trapped
My feelings are numb, almost violently wrapped
The more I try to explode or scream
The more I feel like I’m losing control mentally
The words stick like glue
How can I get over you?
I’m trapped beyond repair
I’m trapped beyond despair
I’m trying to gain control
But how can I when part of me is missing, I’m currently not whole
Feeling like this is a true form of abuse
Because you come in and out of my life and leave me confused
Maybe I need you, maybe I don’t
I’ll never know for sure, because you never stay and you won’t
I’m feeling trapped because of you
I still sit here and wonder, what did I ever do?
Is it because I look just like you? 
Or is it because your father abandoned you too?

Stephanie Davis
May 2021