Trials of a Gladiator

For a long time I always thought something was wrong with me
No one really wanted me around
I was tossed to the wolves at birth left to fend for myself
It was like I had been born a modern day Spartacus
To be tried by fire all of my life only the strong survive
My earliest test began with my child hood with many more battles to come
Everyday they came at me with words sharper than any sword
Their words cut deeper than any blade
A child shouldnt know what blood tastes like
Anger, resentment, sadness, loneliness, countless wounds that left endless scars on my soul to remind me of every battle every time they ache
But as God is my witness i still walked with my head held high
Then as I reached my adult years I became a slave to Love and I was sent to the Arenas of Intimacy
To do battle as a gladiator and fight against emotions, broken hearts, feelings of being forgotten about, being gave up on, lost lovers all more savage than any four legged beast
One more ravenous than the other
Sometimes i fought one on one then at times i was out numbered and overwhelmed
Each one testing my will to see whether i will forsake my emotions and my humanity
Each one leaving a deeper wound than the last but still I continue to awake each day for battle because to yield would be to welcome emotional insanity
Am i man or am i gladiator?
Kill or be killed that is the only option
Every day I continue to fight with aspirations of earning my freedom
To slay all that oppose me in the arena
Victory means being able to embrace loving myself and whoever i chose freely with open arms
I wont always be a slave forced to fight as a gladiator in the Arenas of intimacy