Unwelcome

I don’t feel welcomed
My emotions 
Yes I drown myself in them
Turn a blind eye to them 
Wish someone would grab me by the neck

Pull me up and wipe the hate off 
Save me from the negativity 
And slap the worthless feelings off of my chest
My overthinking has no switch 
I wish I had a single regret 

But I don’t 
Love is the only thing I condone 
Regardless of how broken I’ve become
Fuck the hate that travels within my bones 
My intentions are blunt 
Traumatized 
But always bold

Pure as can be 
Though never whole 
I pray for the day
When I smell the ocean 
Sea 
And reconnect with my soul 

Feel the sand between my toes
Gaze at the glistening sun
Until she’s tired 
And finally allows the moon to be her full bloomed rose 

The night I know
It’s the only time I feel I can truly glow