Poem -

Uprooted

Uprooted

There’s a tree that shadows over me
Casting me in the shade
Draining away the sunlight from my face
Shedding away each blade

 I’ll stay sitting in your nest
Where you reared me
Where you held me to your breast
Once so softly and carefully

your roots they run through my veins
 i don't belong, i cant give you carbon
im the poisonous weeds 
that spread and take up your garden

You gave me the gift of air
But you take it away, i'm without
 I can’t breathe
Will we survive through this drought?

 

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author

 I’ll stay sitting in your nest
Where you reared me
Where you held me to your breast
Once so softly and carefully

 

I couldn't help but feel this deepening pain inside me as I read your words,a part of me feels this way around those I hold close to my heart , I often wonder if I am becoming a disease , imprisoned by my own delirium.

Well crafted 👏👏👏👏👏✍

Reply
author
chloe harford

Wow thank you again, I've really appreciated your feedback it's boosted my confidence in writing. Your interpretation and understanding of it is spot on, exactly how I wanted readings to feel so thank you! And it is about feeling like a disease or a burden in those closest to me.

Reply
author
chloe harford

The tree is a metaphor for someone who reared me and who I feel most safe but who also is the the beholder of the capability to cause me that
pain.
 

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author

I saw that , its an unspoken privilege ,when we are allowed to see the deeper parts of you placed in virtual ink .

Thank you Chloe💐

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author
terry terri ZO

loved it - and your Irish even better -land of poetry-keep writing i will return -

Reply
author
chloe harford

Yes I'm Irish! I've honestly never thought of being good at poetry just found it as a good way of expressing. And being 19 I hope to learn and progress thank you and hope you'll read more :)
chloe~

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author
Dean Kuch

Roots run deep, Chloe, and blood is thicker than water.
The only problem being is that when it comes to trees verses human beings, trees require water to survive.
Blood just ain't gonna do it.
Good use of metaphor here with the personification of a tree as it pertains to you and your life.
Good abcb rhyme scheme.
Well penned...
~Dean Kuch

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author
chloe harford

Thank you for your generous response and time spent reading. Very true about blood thicker than water, your feedback is really appreciated. 
Thank you!
Chloe ~

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author
chloe harford

Thanks everyone for the reads such an achievement alone for my poem to be nominated in the contest :)

Reply
author
Faith Van Riel

Congrats on the nomination!  

Your story is so true as we come from the earth, the tree was the root of evil that held the apple for adam and eve, however using it metaphorically in your own way is a great justice that good comes from as well.  "your roots, they run through my veins" tells the reader you are two of one.....

well done chloe.

Faith

Reply
author
chloe harford

Faith 
thank you so much for your lovely response! I hadn't thought about the story of Adam and eve it would've been great to tie that in somewhere as the poem is about pain and suffering! Thank you for the feedback and read. Love chloe~

Reply
author
Larry Ran

Dear Chloe,

The Serpent slithered down the tree
The one created you and me
Brought evil to "The Garden" pure
Will mankind now be able endure

Peace and Love,
Larry xxx 

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