WHO’S YOUR DIXIE DADDY?

Sons of the Confederacy
Please listen to me
Are you absolutely certain
Of your family pedigree?

Lots of rebels went off
To fight for ‘Old Dixie’
But only a few made it back
And fewer of those
Came back intact

So before you spout
Pride in your heritage
Have your DNA tested
To prove your ancestry 

You might find a carpetbagger
In your live-oak family tree
Or a handsome mulatto
Hidden among the leaves

And you’d realize to your dismay
You’re not the son of a Confederate
Rather, you’re just another
Repugnut conservative hypocrite