Will you still love me?

Will you marry me
Or will you be mad at me
Will you scream at me
Or will you smile happily
Will you say I hate you 
Then kiss me in the morning 
Will our life be fun enough only for the day
Or will it be boring
Will you like the food I cooked
Or say your not hungry anymore
Will you laugh all day
Until the night when you get bored
Will you cry because I don’t know
Will you laugh because I hurt
Will you wake up in the morning feeling like I didn’t give what you deserve 
Will you see the tire in my eyes
From working day and night
While you sit at home and tell me dishes made you tired
Will you still love me when I’m big 
Love me when I’m small
I guess what I hate about myself
Never matters never at all
Because the dishes get thrown at my head
I hold you while your crying in bed
A headache from the night before
When you said you want me dead
Will you still love me?
Or what should I do?
I talked to your family and they said this isn’t like you
So is it me or am I crazy or are you honestly just comfortable just enough
Because while you figure out your emotions 
I’m just giving up…
Not on you of course I don’t want to fight 
But deep inside scared for my life 
But I put so much work in 
That tonight might be the night
So will you still love me when I’m insane
Because you put it in my brain 
Will you still love me on the snow the fall the summer or the rain
Will you still love me?!!??
What do I have to do
To prove that this is true 
I’m an open book but with you I have the lock and shhhsssss
It is not me
I am not me I am tired and fucking ugly
I used to laugh and joke and smile and now I’m scared to say hello
So will you still love me if the sky comes falling even if the day I’m stalling 
Honestly I lost myself but u don’t care about no one else
Will you still love me when I’m hurt
I guesss u never get to see that
Even when I run away I keep u alway on my belt
Will you still love me!??!? 
I hate that I love so much
I wish I could throw my heart away
Because love never keeps me in touch
I’ll die one day because my love and I see it coming soon and all I ever say was is do you still love me til this day??!???