the angel that makes me cry

     I keep sobbing over your sadness, I can't find the words or place or time in my heart to express what it was like to hear you screaming rape while I watched in horror hoping this could only be a dream. I don't care about any type of hell as you could say I ride my bike down there and I just watch the demons as they make funny faces. But anyone who touches you deserves worse than any flaming magical mystical mythological pit of sadness perjury or ungratefulness in any such underworld that could exist. Why on earth would someone want to torture a dead girl who lost her joy of living when she found out what was really gong on. Her father several other guys they raped her brutally beat her so everyone likes the quiet shy pretty girl cuz she's so quiet maybe she only tiptoes because so afraid of shattering eggshells. The idea that some sick idoit would do this to the only person that would stick by my side to defend me hurts about as much as the idea that one of the only ones to defend me is someone who is no longer alive. although everyone claims she is,....that they see her feel her here from her. I dislike the way the public has idolized her. Just because she is pretty doesn't mean she is only for your amusement,.....people need to respect my sister it makes me angry when she says hey alex I don't have any parent can you do dishes for your mom can I use this and such for that. I would say anything you want babe because I never knew you thought so highly of me until you were gone it amazing when you hear your deadfrend's voice in both your and your exs ears in the middle of some heat. "Hey guys I want to join" we both laugh sometimes I just don't like how other approach her. I wish people would respect someone who died before age 21 barely even having a chance to live life just hoping for a better go around next time. So she waits and aks what form I want her to come back as and things like do I wanna be together in the next life the things I never knew we would or could have in common shock me so much I can feel the pan of the burden of scilence

the way she moved cautiously and always hid behind things the fact that she like being thin to be able to run if someone tried to grab or hit her. my sister my best friend I am so sorry this happed ,lexi