From the moment I met you I thought you are indeed a goddess. I mean only them will treat you like how you treated me then. I was shocked, stunned, but was ready for whatever you had to offer. See I was in love with you because I knew then what I didn’t know now. That was the fact you only wanted me so you wouldn’t feel lonely. Not exactly what you planned I get it. You wanted me cause I showed you love where no other man would. I was there for you and stuck by you through your toughest times. I told you to stay focus never lose your mind focusing on me. I should’ve known then you were obsessed with me. As I was with you but over time I saw something inside you that would seal our fate. I saw myself behind bars crying and pleading. It was as if I saw my reality. I knew that I fell into your fantasy and stayed. You flew too close to the sun while I stayed on the ground but I cared so much that I walked up there to save you. And while I did that and you started to walk closer to the ground I was burned by an internal flame. I may never regret it, but I was possessed and stayed in your possession.
If I can call on someone to be there for me that would be you. You’re understanding, a blanket In the cold. You’re everything I want in a friend, even a lover. The reason why I have her in this Is simply not for her to possess me. She doesn’t even have me in her possession. I can come and go as I please. She just had a moment of weakness and that’s when I felt it. I love a passionate woman especially when they are passionate about my presence. Her being passionate about it is not a problem, only why. Why was she so passionate about me when she has another guy to talk to. I felt like if I didn’t give the baby what she wanted she’d cry. I can’t lose my best friend over her wanted me to be around. She had feelings for me, and I for her but I wasn’t gonna be in this triangle of love. If I wanted something or someone I wanted them to myself and to myself alone. I was greedy, but she knew that exactly and played along. She wanted me around like I was her man, but then again she wanted him around too. What for? I asked. I didn’t think nothing of it because she took care of me. So it’s nice to have someone hold you close, even if you’re not the only one. I was hypnotized by her actions. Therefore I was in her possession.
I was their possession. Sometimes I felt like pocket change. I was pulled out and used only when they were down to the last dime of any feelings at all. I paid it attention and forgot what exactly I had bought. It was rough to know that I was owned like a car it was used to some benefit. Or even sometime or somehow not used at all just parading around in a show room. A trophy placed on a shelf for people to look and say “hey I have this, won this from a plum fool”. Then when they see the trophy it’s not a ordinary contest trophy. It’ll be a complete replica of my heart, then one of my mind. Lastly one of my soul. It’s hard being bound to someone you don’t know you’re bound to. Like as if you couldn’t see the chains on your body or that you did and you loved it. I guess that would be me. The guy who loved those chains on him and didn’t care if they had used him, possessed him, kept him, shackled him, and left him in a trance. The day I became free I cried. I knew I was no longer being controlled emotionally nor physically. Rebekah has found someone else, so has Payton. I may write this to be free and finally free myself. Maybe I’m just bitter that I won’t be bound to either of them. Or maybe I’m still in their trance................in their possession.