A friend with disgust

I've no reason to be scripted,
Our chats have always been encrypted. 

I showed you my truth, 
You shunned me and saw it as lies, 
You sat in your booth, 
And yet it's me that still cries. 

I told you I wanted to see you were fine, 
But you think that I would put your integrity on the line..

A friend is a mate that's patient and understands, 
A friend is not one that puts the blame in your hands. 

You've dissected my life, my spirit, my pride, 
I have no choice but from you to hide. 

I have admitted that at times I got teary, 
But words made me weary. 

I cannot explain in normal parlance, 
The pain and venom that our emails do dance, 

I am tired of fights and of confusion, 
And I'm tired fighting my corner trying to add clarity to delusion. 

You've treated me with mistrust, 
My name on your lips brings utter disgust. 

I have not been all the things that you thought I seemed, 
I have not lied, I have not schemed. 

I think in weary hours I tried to find, 
Someone that I once knew to be kind. 

But never really thinking it through, 
I ended up hurting me, 
I ended up hurting you. 

For now I can really say not much more, 
It's time for me to close this heavy door. 

The past is behind it and the future may be dark, 
But I will never degrade us down to the mark. 

The days are done and closed and shut, 
I don't even care that I feel I've been cut, 

It is simply the way that you are wired, 
I don't wish me to and you to be desired.

The end is nigh, 
And all that I did was try.