Axioms With A Twist

“A day without sunshine is like... well... night”
A brilliant axiom I say
To the person who uttered this amazing observation
You certainly just made my day

“If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off”
That's a mighty safe assumption
So stop your belly aching and enjoy yourself
Invite someone for some munchin'

“Don't sweat the petty things or pet the sweaty things”
Surely can get pretty gross
Especially if a person hasn't bathed for a month
Takes the thrill outta being close

“I started with nothing and still have most of it”
This one most certainly hits home
I'm sure almost everyone can relate to these words
Sorry I didn't listen to that gnome

“You can't have it all coz where would you put it”
I'll figure something out you can bet
Buy me a mansion with seventy-three rooms
Become the happiest pack rat yet