Destroyed

I guess I may have to go through this in my down time. Been down since, my mind crowded it astounds it. And I’m pissed cause my conscience split. Rocket ships. Rocking shit how am i gonna cry if I did that shit. You’ve been photogenic since we both texted. Looking through messages. Blessings, as I’m looking at the sentences. Photosynthesis, food for growth. Who would know? Our friendship? other side of the pillow cooler than you know. No mirror smoke. Say something, clear my throat. I’ll be damn if bury you and sing at your funeral. Critical. Kept calling thinking of miracles. Fuck that patch me through to the other side of your coma I need to do something spiritual. If you die which is a lie I’m performing rituals. Hell and back. Hell on my back. Dead on the path. Hounds on my ass. Pounds of a glass. All in my bag, force flexed, damn I’m glad to have you back. Cause I know through thick and thin even if they butcher me I’ll still win, cause I’ll know that you’ll have my back. Please make it out. Here’s my life take it now. I say it proud that pride is hell of a mouthful but it’s easier to swallow then we make it out. 

You know I told my girl this would happen. That I’ll love her and you wouldn’t be happy. That you’ll feel heartless yet thoughtful of me being happy. That you’ll kill yourself and leave me to be alone in my thoughts. I’m glad that after you took those pills you texted me. It’s my fault that you’re like this and I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you in any way possible. I at least can feel better knowing you’re alive. I couldn’t let go. I just couldn’t let you go.