Do you really hurt the people you love?

Hi guys:) this is just something I wrote quickly. Sorry in advance, it's wack??
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You ask me how I am
But do you really care?
I mean I understand you're hurt
But have you ever stopped to ask if I am?
Yes I'm smiling but maybe I'm dying inside but
Of course that doesn't concern you, does it?
"I just want someone to be here for me," you say
"Someone who is constant.
Someone who cares.
Someone who spends their time to make sure I'm fine."
But haven't you noticed I've been here the whole time?
I've told you I care.
I've spend sleepless nights talking to you, even if it's a school night.
I've picked up the phone at 2 am to hear your crying voice telling me that someone did you wrong and I stayed by your side the whole night
But am I not enough?
I feel like an old eraser,
Borrowed and thrown away.
You've told me that you care,
But you're never really there
You tell me self harm isn't an option and yet you're the cause to my pain
And by self harm I don't just mean physically hurting myself;
I mean sleepless nights and tear-stained cheeks have become the normal
Swallow pill after pill because the dreaded feeling of pain in my body-
Starting in my head and spreading all the way down to my stomach-
just won't fade.
I beat myself up for the things you've done because it's always my fault, right?
It has to be.
You got tired of me,
Everyone does
It's not your fault, I just wasn't enough
And yet you come back,
Day after wretched day telling me your bittersweet lines of "I love you please stay by my side."
ButĀ do you really hurt the people you love?
Ā

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Comments
Hi FML!!......I haven't read your stuff before but you do have a fine sense of rhythm when it comes to poetic prose..... with an interesting take on formatting...... you even take a stab into dialogue.... which is not an easy thing to do in poetry....... but it sounds like you have powerful motivation for writing this piece...... all necessary variables when dealing with a writer attempting to become a poetĀ at the highest level!!....... compelling stuff dear poet sister!!...... enjoyed........ look forward to reading more from you........LOVE & ROCKETS!!......T xo ?ā“?
Thank you so much:))