Effrim Finkelstein

Old Mrs. Finkelstein
Had a son named Effrim
And a wonderful son he was
He helped with the house work
He helped with the washing
With rumours, the town was abuzz

Behind Effrim's back
They would whistle and quack
Suggesting he was a little bit sappy
The rumour got around
That Effrim wrote poetry
And dedicated it to his Pappy

Now all the town's jocks
Thought Effrim was a sissy
They taunted and teased him no end
Till one fateful day
The news got around
Effrim would appear on CNN

That day did arrive
Effrim's mug went out
To every TV screen in the town
Larry King once called him
“The greatest living bard!”
O'er the land his poems were renowned

Effrim returned home
To a ticker tape parade
He was no longer taunted and teased
A conquering hero
This quiet young man
With the ending, Effrim was so pleased